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May 26, 2011

How I'm Feeling...

Hey Queens, I just wanted to let you all know how I've been feeling lately since I'm on this God given path. Its one of the most time consuming, and emotionally tolling paths I've ever been on that I can actually remember. So, I just want to share with you my journey thus far in the form of prose. Enjoy & comment!

I have learned a lot in the 6 months I’ve formed Purple W.I.N.G.S., things I’ve learned about myself and others. Trust me I did not think it would be easy. It is never easy to form something, to try and change an environment. It is not easy to save others, even from themselves. You go into philanthropy with the best intentions. Full speed ahead, thinking you will change the world! Then you get hit with the reality that the world likes itself just as it is. That half of the people you are trying to help like their current situation with no intention of changing. They look at you as if you are insane for even insinuating that something is wrong with the way they are living. Couple that with a community who isn’t remotely interested in helping its people. They don’t see a problem…they think, “Kids want to drop out of school? That’s their problem, let’s cut the education budget, because what’s the point?” You become appalled by the attitude but accept it as a cultural norm. Then they continue…“Yeah, were one of the top three hubs for sexual slavery and human trafficking.  We have legal prostitution 90 minutes away, we advertise sin, and hedonistic lifestyles but we don’t need a statewide campaign specifically for the girls of Nevada.” Then you feel like you are trudging on an uphill battle.

You try and rally the people around you, solicit the help of others, they get disheartened to because they realize, this is a whole lot more work than they initially signed up for. Well yeah it is; it’s an enormous amount of work because again, were trying to change the culture of a place who has built its name on the image of immorality and perversion. You realize people can’t wait around for “it” to get off of the ground, that the vision has went over their heads. Their time too precious and the mission to great. You realize this comes with the territory and you move on, actually your time is too precious, and the mission isn’t going anywhere because the population you serve still have needs. Your skin gets tough, and you keep pushing on because you’ve always known the mission is greater than you, the leader. When you doubt your abilities and yourself you talk to GOD he builds you back up, dusts you off, and pushes you back into the race. He places others in your path that will stand the test of time, he gives them the vision also; and together you work in the trenches, pound the pavement, and raise voices in unison to get the mission done. You get new wind, an even greater self-confidence in your abilities as a leader. You do this because it takes a leader to even realize the need, and an even more fire to aggressively pursue change. The blows feel like mere feathers brushing against your skin. You gain a sense of clarity and the vision is that much clearer. Things start to fall into place and you can breathe a little easier. You stand straighter, walk taller, and become a little lighter on your feet. Your smile is broader, and your laugh deeper.

Your blessings are richer, and your fulfillment is deepened. All of this happens with time. This happens when you don’t give up or give in. When you practice discernment to realize those who are supposed to be around you during this path will be, without you trying to make or persuade them too.

This is the life of a philanthropist; a dedicated philanthropist on a God filled mission to make the world a little bit better than when they came. This is my life, and it’s never been so sweet.

Stay Blessed & Happy Locing!


Cheleski Kickin' The knotty Truth said...

Yes, Press Queen. I know oh too well. It's a lonely place to be a leader for a thankless people who ask" Who asked you anyway? I tell ya. I tell God to give me the strength, resources and avenues to do his bidding because God KNOWS that I did not choose this mantle(whatever it may be). It chose ME through HIM. So clear my paths and make it str8! PRESS

Toshia "Writing Addict" Shaw said...

Cheleski, the sting is mighty isn't it? They say ignorance is bliss, until someone or something wakes you up from it. I am trying to do something that no one can actually see besides God and me. Then I question if I can truly see the big picture. It is said God can bless us beyond what we see, for this reason I am bubbling with anticipation! We must press on! God Speed my sister!