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Oct 22, 2009

Should you Date like a White Girl?

Look I can't make this stuff up! Essence published an article in this month's magazine which had a small write up by a woman who suggests that after months and months of dating or lack there of, she decided to date like a white woman. I was unaware there was a difference. Apparently in her opinion white women go on more dates, and have the grandest time. Well, I have to refute this because as a Black woman when I was on the dating scene honey I had a blast. I dated anyone I felt I wanted to. I won't go into my dating history because I already told ya'll how the color of a mans' skin wasn't even a factor. So anyway she went on to say (without direct quotes) that she used to date men with the whole idea that "he might be the one" she always had visions of wedding days, therefore she couldn't enjoy herself on the dates.

So she finally threw in the towel and decided to date whomever she wanted, going on to say she didn't care if it were the valet. Now that's what I'm talking about ladies! Go for it! Go for fun, not dating because you are trying to find Mr. Right! How about Mr. Right now? How about someone to go to the movies with, out to eat, browse the latest artist collection with?

What I am trying to say is, I know some of you are looking for you husband, but why not just lay back and enjoy your time now? How about dating without any expectations? How about allowing Mr. Right to find you? You will never know when he comes along; and he may have already but you were so busy looking for your husband that you overlooked him!

So, I don't exactly know if White girls are having more fun dating, but I know you can too; and it doesn't matter what color you are. So if that bus driver is allowing you to climb 0n the bus without paying your fare, and he keeps staring at you from the rear view mirror(and he's attractive) why not give him a smile back?

I'm just saying...

Stay Blessed & Happy Locing!


Brandiss said...

I read that article too. I found it very interesting. I don't really do the dating thing right now because I am so busy. But I guess when I do start again, I will know to just have fun and not focus so much on wondering if he's THE ONE.

Nickelicious said...

Hey- that is an idea! Really, I have never dated often because I have always had the notion of only dating guys that I thought would be good marriage material. But this is truly something to think about....
Thanks Writing Addict.

n.harlem said...

Hey there! Thanks for blogging about the article. I absolutely wasn't trying to say white women have more fun dating. Haha. I really just wanted to open up the dialogue on how sistas often miss out on dating because sometimes folks will try to scare us into thinking that black women should date in fear of becoming some sort of statistic (the kind of statistics specifically directed toward brown girls).

White girls aren't told one out of four white men are imprisoned, on the DL, etc. and should settle for good enough as soon as they can find it. I just used the title to point out what one group is pressured to believe versus the other.

I think every sista should be unafraid to date -- in the same way you say you dated. That is -- enjoying the adventure without expectation.

Your blog is DOPE, by the way. I'll have to pass your link on to my girls.