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Jul 8, 2009

Loc Envy

A good point was brought up by my site partner, and former Loc'd Beauty Kitty Soulflower. She mentioned that she might be experiencing some Loc Envy at her place of business. So I am going to address that. I have experienced it, and have even been guilty of loc envy back in my premature loc days myself:

When you are working in an environment where locs are not usually worn, or understood you will have the stares, questions, sneers, comments, and envy. Not to mention gossip! Just imagine you are working somewhere, corporate perhaps, where the women are expected to dress professional, and have an image that conforms to the head honcho's standard of beauty. That usually means; pant or skirt suits, straight hair, minimal makeup, and minimal jewelry. So in walks this:

She looks pretty right? I mean she is clean, dressed professionally so whats the problem right? Well, you have to realize that people will never understand why you are comfortable in your own skin. They don't get why you chose to be yourself naturally, while your office counterparts are donning wigs, weaves, and extensions to try and look so called professional, or pretty.

You are oblivious to the snickers, stares, and looks. You overlook their ignorance, and continually answer their questions.
"Yes, I can wash my hair. Well, I wash it about once or twice a week. No it is all my hair. No, it does grow like this. Its not "things" its my hair, yes, in fact my man does like my hair like this."
I have gone through this trust me. I have had to go above and beyond to prove my worth, and that I deserve that promotion when up against my non black counterparts. And, yes, my hair has played a major role in my success while in business.

There will be loc envy. There will be some black women who have been in business for some time who think that you are doing yourself a grave injustice by wearing your hair natural. Because you see when they entered business years ago, they weren't allowed to wear their hair natural! If they tried to wear a cute lil afro or braids, they were told that their hair was unprofessional. Our hair was accused of being an eyesore. Unfit in its natural state, and they believed that.

Then there are the sisters that don hair weaves just as long, and straight as your non black counterparts, because they are afraid of what would happen to them if they did not. Also, because they were raised to keep their hair straight and that, "naps" and "kinky" hair is bad. However, deep down they yearn to let their hair be natural, be it kinky, wavy, Afro, or loc'd.

For women hair is sacred, it holds meaning. For some women it defines them (which should not be). But let me share the following with you:
As a Queen you need to be patient. Yes, I know the questions get on your nerves. I know the statements they say are ignorant...I've heard them all before:

"Eww, dreads are nasty. You can't even wash them. Your's aren't but them people who don't wash them, blah, blah, blah."
But you know what? Those same women have loc envy, and wish that deep down inside they had the courage to be true to themselves. So, don't go on the defense. Just smile sweetly, twirl a loc or two, and do the famous white girl toss! LOL Okay, don't do that, but do smile sweetly. Keep those locs clean, neat, and styled for work. Remember, its their problem not yours. You are on your path to Queendom.

Please don't get me wrong. I love a cute relaxed short cut! I wore my hair like that for years. I don't have anything against a sistah who is rocking a hot relaxed weave. Especially when it goes undetected, and is maintained meticulously. But, I am just pro natural hair, not natural nazi, just want whats best for us inside and out. I speak from experience. We have to be patient with our own. You can do this by staying true to yourself. By not feeding into the negativity. You will be surprised at how they will start to come around out of curiosity, and want to go natural themselves. Remember Queens have to set the example!


lovinmylittlelocs said...

Thank you, I am happy to be an example but sorry it took me soo long

Enchantress said...

Great post!